GREETINGS FROM ABROAD, THE AKUA DONKOR COMEDY

"Her Excellency" Akua Donkor sitting (L-R, 1st on the second roll) behind Dr. Spio Gabrah

Until now, it never crossed my mind I could ever be drawn towards partisan politics and be that interested in the presidential race. Sincerely, I am surprised that I am getting interested. Now, it has even gone beyond interest to decision to join the presidential race come 2016. The attractions are just becoming too big to ignore. 

Undeniably, my chances at occupying the flagstaff house are bleak; my defeat in 2016 is as certain and can be predicted much the same way you are able to forecast night following day. If I am not lucky, I may not even pull parity with the Arthur Kennedy records in the history of partisan politics and local elections but that will not deter me. My target now may not necessarily be the presidential seat as you are thinking; I have my own priorities.

At least, joining the race will shoot me from obscurity to national prominence and I will enjoy the accompanying fame and privileges. I will become an expert on most (if not all) national issues, — an expert whose opinion and comments the news-hungry media will stampede one another for.

Top of it all, I will be guaranteed a seat in the midst of topmost dignitaries at state/national events and will enjoy the protocol that comes with it. Don’t forget that by that singular political decision of contesting, my slot on presidential trips is locked because I would then be “wielding more power than most of this ministers” who are now doing “paapaaa” here and there. 

From that point, my monotonous Accra-Odumase Krobo trips will change to Accra-Milan, Accra-Johannesburg, Accra-Amsterdam, Accra-Lagos etc. and give me the much needed exposure and international experience by way of presidential excursions. If this is what the decision to contest in the presidential race comes with, I am interested and I am going for it. Don’t ask me of my background/expertise and what the justification is for those special treats I hope to enjoy. If you have any such question, ask Her Excellency Akua Donkor, State Protocol/Presidency or, maybe you may want to find out from the John Dramani Mahama himself.

THE STATE-SPONSORED AKUA DONKOR EXCURSION

Delegations for presidential trips are composed based largely on the nature of the assignment at stake and because this comes with huge expenses and, if you like, security concerns, it is carefully done; you must be trusted and or relevant to the business or high level trip to be included. Strictly speaking, they (such trips) are not for sightseeing, unless the few that are so purposed. But once in a while, we are slapped with comedies on how state-sponsored presidential trips are turned into excursions.

The President, His Excellency John Dramani Mahama, was with the Pope (Italy) recently to make some business out of an Expo in the city of Milan which is said to be the second most populous in Italy. Among the business opportunities this big event, which attracted over 150 countries, presented, the President and his team were to learn of new technologies in agro-processing, expected to be replicated here in Ghana on their return as we strive to make more gains from our agricultural sector.

You will expect that the team will be a tight one (the best of teams) with people who could make the best of the event like experts in the sector as well as industry players, who will return to pollinate others and get the knowledge spreading to help us make the most of our rather under-utilised agric potential.

Admittedly, one or two people who are justifiably relevant to the assignment like the Trade Minister, Hon Dr. Ekow Spio Gabrah; Food and Agric Minister, Fifi Kwetey, among others, joined in the trip but same were those who clearly were miscellaneous and a needless burden on the state coffers.

Another round of comedy in 2016?

One of those is the Founder and Leader of the Ghana Freedom Party, “Her Excellency” Akua Donkor.  What was she doing in the team and by what criteria was she selected? That she founded a political party that once joined the race to the flagstaff house? That she is a farmer and or the leader of farmers in Ghana? Or that she is multilingual (interpreter) needed to interpret Italian, English and the other international languages that were used at the event? Could it be that she was included just so we will be seen to be moving towards the inclusive government concept many are calling for? Which other party was represented, if that was the basis?  I think I even saw her in the team that graced the swearing in of Nigeria’s President, Muhamadu Buhari.

Given her literacy level and particularly her rather “weird” way of reasoning (bluntly put) on serious national issues which give her out as someone who is unable to appreciate weightier matters, she certainly should not be one of those to front international engagement for a country like Ghana, unless this is our best foot forward.

CONCERT PARTY

Well I listen to Akua Donkor for purposes of comic relief; she has made quite a significant and enviable stride in the area of political comedy and entertainment, in a rather short period since she emerged on the scene and so unless she was added and state-sponsored (air ticket, allowance, accommodation etc.) for same droll and funny reason (at a time when we should be cutting down on wastage), our priorities are regrettably turned upside down and will for a long time, hold us stagnant at the point where our equals have long passed.

I have spoken my mind; let the discerning reader make meaning of this piece. The writer is a journalist (an activist writer) and a blogger and can be reached via klonobi2007@gmail.com. You can follow him on twitter with the handle @henkingklonobi 

NB: All pictures used in this story were sourced from the net

The story as captured in page 34 of  the July 27, 2015 edition of the Daily Graphic newspaper